Dear Modern Diary

DMD, 14th September is my saddest day of all. You know why? That's the day my saaa has left me :'( I am unable to sleep again after I woke up around 4.30am. I was just waiting for my Subuh prayer and waiting for the time to reach 8am for me to get up and go out to see him for the final time. I feel sad now itself while writing this and the most epic part is that the song that was playing on the radio now is Dewa 19 Cintaku Tertinggal di Malaysia. Terbaik. Even make me sad. I met him that day, ate breakfast with him, help him to do his final clearance and finally it's time to bid goodbye to each other. The most difficult part for me to do that I wish it would never come. How can I not cry at the moment I have to say that word 'Good Bye' and even now I am crying at the thought of that day. Oh my God, I am hopeless am I?? Well, he is the man that I truly cared for and I love my heart out. Now I know how does it feel when you really love a person all out....

Dear DMD, It's been so long... How are you? There has been a lot of things that happened that I did not share with you but I guess I will start writing again. A lot of people has been coming in and leaving as well. And the most recent one would be someone whom I cared for dearly. He is going to leave,for real. That is heartbreaking :'( I am so sad until I can't feel anything anymore. Sometimes I wonder whether I'm a human. My best buddy, my gossip partner, my girl talk partner, my secret keeper, my advisor, my assignment buddy and my Peter is leaving me :'( The feeling is like your boyfriend leaving you behind to serve the nation for war. We might not know what is the fate after that whether can be reunite again or not. Ohh, how cruel this world can be. How come God have organize the life to be in such way?? I can't say he is cruel as he may have reason for all that happens. He is the Almighty. But I am losing someone that is important to me :...